Skip to main content

sleep

So today consisted of:

8:30am - awake. Not because I want to be, but because Alun has licked his finger and put it in my ear.

"Morning, Gorg! Margaret river todaaayyyy!" he sings.

*sigh*

9:00am - help Alun load cases and bags of food (mostly of beers) into the car boot.
Why?
Because Alun is taking his parents 5 hour's drive away for 3 whole days.

YAY YAY YAY!!!

*happy dance*

9:05am - realise Alun is going away from me. Panic.

9:10am - refuse to let go of Alun who is chuckling and trying to get my arms off his waist

9:15am - tearfully wave goodbye as Al and his parents reverse from the driveway. Convinced - 100% - that I will never see him again, somehow.

9:30am - back to bed.

Blissful, wonderful, peaceful sleep. Sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep, sleep.

11:00am - leave home to go to a Doctor's appointment.

11:20am - In the waiting room, anxious as hell and wishing I was home. Leaving the comfort of a now guest-free (hooray!) house is really, really hard.

11:35am - Leaving the Doctor's clinic and wiping away tears as I clutch a week's medical certificate. The Doctor I saw was new, I've not seen him before. He asked why I needed to see him, I burst into hysterical tears. He said I was suffering 'burn out' and 'excessive stress' and recommended 'bed rest' for the whole week.

WINNING!!!

11:50am - meet with my dear friend Cat for 'breakfast'. Order blueberry pancakes. They are awful and dry - as if they were cooked a week ago and have been re-heated in a sandwich press. Eat them anyway. Enjoy Cat's giggle and love the feeling of sitting across the table from my friend.

12:30pm - Honestly admit to Cat I am struggling being away from home and that my eyes are heavy and I need more sleep. Cat understands immediately and insists on driving me home.

12:45pm - Get back into bed.

Sleep. SO MUCH SLEEP. SO GOOD.

4:30pm - Wake up. Potter about the house in my pjs. Enjoy the SILENCE and the knowledge that Alun's parents are not walking around, touching everything and muttering away in Welsh.

THIS IS AWESOME.

5:00pm - Talk on the phone to Claudie - saying anything and everything I want to - because there are no office gossips waiting to take me down, Alun isn't about so I don't have to worry I'll worry and stress him out and his parents are nowhere to be seen so I can complain about how much I miss the space and quiet at home and IT IS WONDERFUL to be able to talk so freely.

5:30pm - Water the garden in my pjs. Realise I am smiling. I haven't smiled in so long. This feels great.

6:00pm - Talk online with a few mates.

7:00pm - Talk online with Marc and ignore all other messages because let's face it, he's my favourite. He is unwell so I worry about him. Even so, his cheeky sarcasm comes out and when he complains the same way Alun does about my friend Genevieve and how bossy she is when I post on Facebook about anything environment/food related, I laugh.

I haven't laughed in what feels like so long.

Now, one of my favourite shows is on telly. I've poured myself another pint of coke (don't tell Genevieve) and will heat up the pizza Alun made me (bless him) for dinner.

Then you know what? I will probably sleep. AGAIN.

All night. In my own home with NO GUESTS.

I love this, you guys. I love this.

#ThankyouGod #Blessed


Comments

Popular posts from this blog

best $270.00 I've ever spent, honestly :)

Now that I've written that, I can remember other things I've loved spending HUGE amounts on: * the first time I got my hair chemically straightened :) * when I bought Jon a "year's pass" to the movies - he loved that gift more than anything else I've ever given him * any time I give Mom 'board money' because she's always so grateful and seeing her smile is a blessing anyway *sigh* back to the point... ...today I'm writing to you from a Travelodge Hotel Room. I know...not the most amazing Hotel - but you wouldnt believe how nice my room is. It's a "deluxe suite" and is big, comfortable, pretty and best of all *big smile* it's airconditioned!!! OH YEAH!!! In this horrid, dry and yet super humid Perth heat...being able to sleep to the hum of a working and LOVELY air conditioner is definitely worth the money I've paid. Here's what lead to this: My anxiety began with coming home to find the carpet pulled up, m...

and then, we move on...

Sometimes moving on can be so hard. I remember last year when I got "released" from hospital. The fear of leaving that safe trauma ward was awful. I hated thinking "oh God...now I'll be on my own and I still cant walk"...but you know what? we move on. We move on from petty fights with friends, from stupid family things, from broken hearts and crap days and we hope for better things. Im blessed because I'm experiencing those 'better things' right now, actually. Think about it, Im at work (so Im thankful for a job), I have the world's most amazing people as my friends (seriously, all my friends are worth their weight in gold) I have a safe home, lots of food and money... and I have an amazing boyfriend. Alun met up with me yesterday at the Royal on a sunny, warm Perth day. He had something in a huge shopping bag and held it out to me with an excited grin "OMG Janet - open it, you're gonna LOVE it!" and the smile on his face r...

10...and then 5 :)

Yeah I can tell Im getting better because even though things are tough right now and Im sad and a bit fed up and weary...I still have hope :) I cant help it, it's who I am. I got an email from "Sandy" today. I really care about her and I look up to her and will probably read her email again when im less tired from a long day and it will make more sense...but for now, what I think she was trying to say to me was to take a bit more ownership of my life and to stop asking God to fix it all...or something like that...and I want you to know, Sandy - Im taking ownership of it and doing it ALL myself...but I believe in God and I believe that he hears me and so Im taking EVERYTHING to Him and just asking for some direction on this. I'll email you personally about about that another day. Thanks for always being there for me. I keep trying and failing and falling, then getting excited about something new and getting back up. Im on a very strange path just now and although...