Skip to main content

sometimes growing hurts

Sometimes growing is awesome...you feel like you've learnt something and want to rush outside and start changing the world - I felt like that when I was little. I'd pack a lunch in my 'barbie' backpack, jump on my clunky old bmx and go out 'exploring' wanting to change the world and make it a better place...

...and sometimes growing just hurts your heart.

...like it did today when I heard a knock in the door and called out happily "who is it?" (I was expecting Deane - he came over last night and we had a great chat) and heard a very quiet "It's Bec"...

...and just like that, time just stopped. In the space of 2 seconds, these things happened:

* I remembered Bec and I laughing and hugging when we went to Fremantle markets and had a great day
* I remembered the first day I met Bec and thought my brother had fallen in love with the most beautiful girl I had EVER seen
* I remembered being in England and missing Bec more than I missed my brother...and for me...that's a big deal
* I remembered walking home from the gym so often here in Perth 3 years ago and NEVER leaving the gym without hearing my phone ring and laughing as I told Bec all about my workout and got tips on how to eat healthy from her
* I remember having to leave Perth and the heartwarming card Bec wrote me
* I remember the Christmas Jay and Bec came out to England and it was the FIRST Christmas where I had MY family there as well as Jon's and to this day it means the world to me
* I remember knowing I could always count on Bec. She'd always be there for me, always return emails, always answer my calls, always make time for me
* Then...THEN...I remembered that last phonecall and the things she said. The way I had just survived the hardest, darkest, most compelling,  evil night of my life and when I was at the end of my rope and could take no more, she told me how worthless I was and it hurt more than if someone had shot me right in the heart. I remembered the text she sent to my brother (but somehow copied me in on?) and what she said about me-to my own brother-and I cringe. It hurts so much.

So I was faced with a tough choice for when I opened the door.

Do I smile?
Hug?
shake hands?
walk off?
shout?
shake my head and ask with tears in my eyes: "Why?"

I opened the door and Bec stepped in, looked past me and asked "Does your Mom have email?"

I just wanted to cry.

Instead, I went over to the computer and awkwardly shuffled papers about.

Where did it all go so wrong?

I love my sister-in-law like my very own sister.

This is what I should have done...what I wish I did:

I should have said "Hey Bec! Im so happy to see you" and I would have meant it with all my heart. I should have put my stupid pride aside and hugged her tight and asked if we could both start over.

But instead, walls went up and I got cross and mostly ignored Bec while she and Mom chatted about holidays. To her credit, Bec was more of a grown up and called out to include me in the conversation a few times. Nettled by the FACT that she was being more mature than me, I answered in one-word replies and sulked.

Then she was gone and Im here thinking Im a huge idiot and wondering why I cant let the past go.

Bec...if you're out there...I'm sorry for whatever hurt I caused you. I miss you and I hope you'll forgive me and want to start over as much as I do.

Today I'm left wondering...If I made the trek out to Ellenbrook to see Bex and gingerly knocked on the door...what would SHE do?

Peace out, bloggers. Pray for me? xx

Comments

  1. Its like you rеad my mіnd! You аppeаr
    tо know a lot about this, like you wrote the book in it оr somеthing.
    I thinκ that you cаn do wіth some pics to drive the
    message home a bit, but inѕtеad of that, thіs is еxcellеnt blog.
    An excellent read. І will сertainly be bаck.
    My blog ; how to stop snoring at night

    ReplyDelete
  2. Simplу wіsh to sау your article
    is as аmazing. Τhе сlaгity for yоur publish іs juѕt
    ѕρectacular and i сan think you're knowledgeable in this subject. Well together with your permission allow me to grab your RSS feed to stay up to date with drawing close post. Thanks a million and please carry on the rewarding work.

    Look into my web site: payday loans

    ReplyDelete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

best $270.00 I've ever spent, honestly :)

Now that I've written that, I can remember other things I've loved spending HUGE amounts on: * the first time I got my hair chemically straightened :) * when I bought Jon a "year's pass" to the movies - he loved that gift more than anything else I've ever given him * any time I give Mom 'board money' because she's always so grateful and seeing her smile is a blessing anyway *sigh* back to the point... ...today I'm writing to you from a Travelodge Hotel Room. I know...not the most amazing Hotel - but you wouldnt believe how nice my room is. It's a "deluxe suite" and is big, comfortable, pretty and best of all *big smile* it's airconditioned!!! OH YEAH!!! In this horrid, dry and yet super humid Perth heat...being able to sleep to the hum of a working and LOVELY air conditioner is definitely worth the money I've paid. Here's what lead to this: My anxiety began with coming home to find the carpet pulled up, m...

and then, we move on...

Sometimes moving on can be so hard. I remember last year when I got "released" from hospital. The fear of leaving that safe trauma ward was awful. I hated thinking "oh God...now I'll be on my own and I still cant walk"...but you know what? we move on. We move on from petty fights with friends, from stupid family things, from broken hearts and crap days and we hope for better things. Im blessed because I'm experiencing those 'better things' right now, actually. Think about it, Im at work (so Im thankful for a job), I have the world's most amazing people as my friends (seriously, all my friends are worth their weight in gold) I have a safe home, lots of food and money... and I have an amazing boyfriend. Alun met up with me yesterday at the Royal on a sunny, warm Perth day. He had something in a huge shopping bag and held it out to me with an excited grin "OMG Janet - open it, you're gonna LOVE it!" and the smile on his face r...

10...and then 5 :)

Yeah I can tell Im getting better because even though things are tough right now and Im sad and a bit fed up and weary...I still have hope :) I cant help it, it's who I am. I got an email from "Sandy" today. I really care about her and I look up to her and will probably read her email again when im less tired from a long day and it will make more sense...but for now, what I think she was trying to say to me was to take a bit more ownership of my life and to stop asking God to fix it all...or something like that...and I want you to know, Sandy - Im taking ownership of it and doing it ALL myself...but I believe in God and I believe that he hears me and so Im taking EVERYTHING to Him and just asking for some direction on this. I'll email you personally about about that another day. Thanks for always being there for me. I keep trying and failing and falling, then getting excited about something new and getting back up. Im on a very strange path just now and although...